Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
No better way to find a friend than to offer cyber sex and see what happens
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
You're just mad at the fact that I want to be a car alarm.
That was the gentlest I've ever been bitten in the face by a dog
They really brought out their best strippers for vday weekend
Worst case scenario: I have VD and will die. That's the worst that could happen. As long as I'm around long enough to see the winner of bachelor pad, I'm cool
if I die on the way please explain to my mother that I do not wear fishnets on a regular basis
Should I have a moral quandary about Skyping topless with him while his son slept in the other room?
I can't answer my phone I'm at work
I slept with a male stripper last night. Priorities
I've only fucked to 2 Fleetwood Mac songs, that must be why my life feels so empty.
New low: uploading my contacts into Facebook in an attempt to get the name of the girl I brought home last night.
She rode me wearing nothing but a Santa hat. Merriest fucking Christmas!
I woke up this morning to pee and six dollar bills fell out of my underwear. I guess that lap dance just bought me lunch.
If I hear that song one more time I will drive to hell and make John Lennon eat my ass.
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