i need a lesbian romance or unplanned pregnancy for some spicein my life.
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
The cab driver referred to me as his little gumdrop, im sure he won't feel the same when he sees the vomit all over his floor.
Theres a truck parked on the front yard and i just want to take this opportunity to tell you now that it is not my fault.
he forgot there was a midterm today. i watched him break his own finger to get out of it.
Exactly. Because my vagina can't be consoled with words. It requires a thicker form of communication
I'm the fucking queen of sexting. I just made a blowjob sound so poetic I'm wishing I were a guy just so I could blow me. Learn from me.
I would like you to know I am eating your apology chocolate, which means i forgive you for puking everywhere before formal
She looks like a hot George Washington...I'm going for it
That's a lot of judgement coming from a man wearing a dress made from a bedsheet.
i'm gonna friendzone myself so you dont have to
Ha! Just garden hosed my vag and thought of you.
I knew she was the one when we had sex to the halo soundtrack.
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