goodnight i made you a song goodbye
the australian girl literally just drank an entire pitcher of beer in about twenty seconds. i want to go to there.
Someday you'll be stoned enough to create a one-person step team and then you'll understand
It was like an alcohol war zone and you left a soldier behind.
How was your 8:30 class today?
Non existent. I just threw up in my water bottle on the bus.
I am going to borrow your water/shock proof video camera for St. Pattys day so that if wake up next to the highway again I know why.
Ok but I hold the right to any footage of you getting slapped, puking, anything with body shots, and allowed to make a montage of it to put on youtube.
Sorry for rubbing my feet on you and repeating "good pony, stay."
Haha, I gave you the rest of the cash I had on me and you bought 3 shots for yourself and beer for everybody except me FUCKFACE.
We're getting paid a considerable amount of money to send each other pictures of our dicks...
I don't drink nearly as much when I'm coupled, and that's not a lifestyle I can commit to
I'm sorry I didn't get you anything for your birthday
It's just you didn't get me the fucking bear suit last year
Feel weird saying this on Facebook, but a dildo collecting demigod sounds like somebody I'd at least hang with for a minute.
Haha. I found pics last week of me getting motorboated by a girl while i was taking a shot. Hahaha in my wedding dress. Classy
i have a strong feeling that today will be a naked day for me...i don't feel like doing shit
DRUNK COOKIES
Are you drunk or are the cookies drunk or are these cookies that get you drunk?
Yes
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