ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
His facebook status is an owl city song. I'm so glad i didn't end up fucking him.
You said you wanted to go to louisiana and get arrested by Steven segal
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude...disintegrating condoms. Think about it. For all the guys that wanna go raw dog but their girls won't let them, and for the girls that wanna get pregnant but their guys don't want a kid. What do you think?
I think you've been hitting the soco too hard again.
She was stumbling around looking for her cat. She said i could help, but i had to call him by his jungle name
He gave me a hug and said "He doesn't deserve you, Anna. Your boobs are great, and I'd fuck you anytime. Any. Place." I need a new 'gay' friend.
This is the third time that ive slept with him. He bought me more milk. I can feel the romance growing.
I had another sex dream about you but it was very dissatisfying. As you finished you starting singing the star spangled banner. then you left. I was not amused.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Our conversation concluded a weekly schedule of casual sex in between classes.
I want to show up to tomorrow's study group looking like I got hit by a train. A train made of dicks.
You dropped my mother on the dance floor. She has a concussion. You didn't apologize. Don't speak to me for a while.
I think one of my ovaries is committing suicide. But that is a topic for another day.
I can't wait to see you & have espresso-fueled sex
So apparently my bro is going to make me fix his tattoo this trip... He sent me a pic of said tattoo. Tattoo is of a sperm, on his penis, which was in a woman's mouth... Wth
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