The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
I'm good, just tired from chardonnay and giving hand jobs.
Sending me a thank you card for letting you fuck my sister was completely inappropriate
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I would literally rather jam a rusty rail road spike into my cock than be here right now. The whore showed up and now I might smash my iPhone into my face repeatedly until I'm no longer consisting of any sort of life.
My vagina and my morals are playing tug of war
he spent like 10 minutes trying to convince us that he was throwing up in the bushes on purpose in order to cut weight for wrestling
No he's here. We were watching Harry Potter stoned as shit and he fell asleep with his head in my lap. I'll figure out what to do with him after Harry gives Dobby the sock.
He is peeing inside and sticking up for himself. Those are two of the four signs of the apocalypse.
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You want to groom your chest hair? You mean with a little baby chest hair brush? Because that sounds adorable.
He said you asked to eat pepperoni off his dick and he thought it was weird
I mean I thought it sounded fun
i swear to god it was like we were fucking in 9 dimensions
We just fucked each other sober. #goteam
We were covered in sweat and glitter, making out onstage, in front of everyone. I think it was a good night.
I know it sounds cheesy, but i think both me and her mum know they are "thanks for being so cool about finding nudes of your daughter on the camera" flowers
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