Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
Hulk Hogan has now convinced 2 women to marry him & I have yet to have a successful or healthy relationship. I am officially depressed.
i wish i could shrink down to the size of his dick so i could just thank it in person.
I meant to tell you earlier: bad life decision saturday has been moved wednesday this week
sorry can't make it tonight, greg's getting back from italy. he's had two weeks of carbs and no gym; now's my chance to get myself a piece of that newly-fat, low self-esteemed ass.
I hope I take a shit on your face in your dreams tonight.
At some point last night Lemondrops turned into me doing shots of vodka and eating sugar packets at the bar.
You forgot your "boyfriend" from last night on my couch. You're suppose to bring that shit with you.
when in doubt, mount your coworker in the staff room.
We've had gay sex and pie, the holiday season has officially begun.
I've never been so drunk at home. I just sat on the toilet playing with toilet paper for ten minutes, I almost made a paper crane.
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
It's a shame things ended how they did. We were well on our way to transforming from acquaintances with benefits to friends with benefits.
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
Hey! Its not the first time I've been eaten out in a bridesmaids dress in a church by a groomsman!
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