We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
Sry I left before you woke up. The house was really fucked up and I didn't feel like helping you clean. PS Somebody threw up on your dog
they arrested me when i was peaking, i'm pretty sure they were specifically looking for me but i was too busy rolling around, loving the grass to notice the police car..
Did you really just use your nipple as a unit of measurement?
You walked in, sat down, looked at the waiter and said, "I'm only having deserts and liquor."
My password hint says "not sunset, also facebook." i need to stop doing computer things while high. I will never figure this clue out.
He smashed a plastic chair leg on a tree stump, threw himself into the side of our metal enclosure, stomped on the wreckage for a bit and then punched the fire.
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
This guy at the airport was telling me 3/4 dudes in his group got rufied at some strip club. One guy woke up in the hospital, another found himself in a random parking garage, the other got back to the room and they all shit their pants. Go Vegas.
This means I've slept with 2 ppl that live in vans...my life is complete
Of course I fucked him. He's a professional beat boxer, his entire job is to do complicated shit with his tongue.
Did you just email Kelly and I gay dinosaur erotica?
I moved to this city Tuesday and got laid Saturday. Still got it.
Remember when I puked into a mesh garbage can in the middle of a meeting and told the clients it was "morning sickness"?
hahah yep
Well the are flying back here, it's been like 10 months, should I frame fake baby pics in my office?? Or too much?
We go out and drink, fuck, and I stay the night. He agrees to it because he knows I'll hook him up to IV fluids in the morning. Everyone wins
Randomize
