I got date raped at Sigma Chi last night!
Dude, you never made it to Chi last night. You fell into a tree and passed out.
wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
I am midnight drunk by noon
And you just kept trying to fit through the dog door and not drop Jello shots.
Just grabbing my bra from a history teacher's desk in the Humanities building. Maybe I should stop drinking on weeknights
I hope your sleeping good cuz when u wake up im punching you square in the face
He's trying to marry me, when is the appropriate time to tell him my real name and that Dallas is a completely fictitious slutty alter ego? I need the advice of someone with morals.
I'm not driving across town for three thrusts and an excuse
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
Yeah. I found my shirt from last night while walking back to the bar to get my purse/phone this morning. I'm never going to even ask what actually happened. Be glad you moved 7 states away.
It's acceptable to bring him back to my parents house and fuck on the couch right??
I had sex with a mask on because I have the flu and I didn't want to get him sick.
I don't think it counts as a booty call at 6:30 pm.
I'm that daughter that had to send her mother "DON'T GET SHITFACED" & yes, in ALL CAPS.
I want your attention. I want your attention in the form of your penis inside my vagina.
Randomize
