What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.
and then she said I drew a line on her forehead with my cum and whispered "Simba"
WHAT IS WRONG WITH SOCIETY?!?!?!
... says the kid who took a shit in my parents dishwasher...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
we got blazed and looked up peoples criminal records
the 24 hour champagne diet aint going so well
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
you would not believe what I got pierced last night...
son, I feel like that is a phrase a father never wants to hear.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Everytime I know she spent a lot of time on her hair for one of our dates, I intentionally cum on the top of her head. That's how she knows I pay attention.
"Don't get as drunk as I was on my birthday" has been upgraded from a goal for Friday night to a goal for my life in general.
All three of us got laid last night. This is what is commonly referred to as the Trifuckta.
Girl, we were harassing people from the top of a building. I don't know how I got down, but I'm eating chocolate cake in my kitchen. Sall good yo.
Hooked up with a guy that looked like Dean Thomas. Mediocre at best, but I stopped myself from calling him Dean in bed. So I got that going for me.
I felt like a responsible adult. A responsible adult that may or may not end up shitfaced. But not heaving purple puke into a urinal like last time because I'm classy now.
Randomize