my grandpa was trying to put butter into the pepsi and i'm like "grandpa what are you doing" and he looks down and goes "well i guess that wouldn't taste good anyway"
i would totally switch to progressive if they'd let me bang that girl in the commercial.
seagrams + popov + pineapple + milk. there, ur search for worlds worst drink is over. you're welcome
similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
just looked at his mug shot... not really my type
OH MY GOD. JESUS STRIPPER. THERE IS A JESUS STRIPPER HERE. A STRIPPER DRESSED AS JESUS.
I jerked him off and then punched him in the face for no reason. Typical evening drinking Sailor Jerry's.
I would makeout with my roommate, but im not drunk enough and she doesnt like bacon fat
Exactly. Some of us want to get married. And some of us want to wear sombreros and do cocaine. To each their own.
And then after we fucked he wouldn't stop calling me "champ". It was like I had sex with an extremely attractive soccer coach
He kept sending me videos of his dogs while I was trying to masturbate. At what point does getting vagina-block apply?
Your actions as of last night have earned you over thirty new nicknames.
Taking care of drunk people fulfills my need to be a mother
Dont worry, the Canadians are more afraid of you then you are of them.
Randomize