she was left over bi-product, like the hotdog of the human race
i'm sitting in the pool eating chicken pot pie with my little brother's friend. moments like these are the reason i love weed.
Yeah go get her. And don't bring her clothes I want her to walk back in her Christmas stocking dress. Take pictures.
want the rest of his teeth to fall out while he slowly dies alone. Pretty sure I'm to the anger phase.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
hey. so did i get tied up by a jumprope last night?
Dude that girl I hooked up with Tuesday is in lecture. I told her I was from the Dominican visiting my cousin and was leaving the next day. Hiding under my hood and hangover.
Should I have a moral quandary about Skyping topless with him while his son slept in the other room?
We haven't even scratched the surface on the damage we could do. Just saying
Using mass transit when I'm hungover makes me feel like I missed my calling as a serial killer
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know you're too high when you find yourself crying at " hand in my pocket" by Alanis Morissette because it's "just TOO REAL"
He will forever be known as the toe sucker who may or may not have been a father
I just got his Save the Dave and, to answer your next question, NO I AM NOT GOING TO THE WEDDING OF THE GUY WHO GOT DRUNK AND CAME ON MY CHEST.
he had DANDRUFF in his PUBES. 0/10 would not blow again.
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
i'm currently watching a guy eat a bunch of cacti and i have lost all faith in humanity
**cactuseses
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