Is it weird that I miss finding cum in my bed?
I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
I love Welcome Back Week...No I wont accept your god but i will accept that hot dog
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
I thought you just gave him blowjobs and he criticized your drug use.
I'm sure me singing - rather loudly - "fuck me in the back seat" last night didn't help either.
Whiskey and an unstable home life is apparently the fountain that 20-something boys like to drink from.
I think he's speaking German to me now
Nevermind, he's just drunk and not texting properly
A group of drunk Marines just serenaded me, never leaving this place
Why do you have an empty bottle of port in your bathroom bin?
I bet Billy Ray Cyrus wishes he had pulled out now....
alright well Taco Bell Closes at 12 so you better pray to god she's asleep by then or I'm running in your house butt ass naked with a bag of tacos
Someone threw up pink in the shower, there's a golf cart tipped over on the lawn and Cousin Brian is missing. What could Friday night throw at us?
Almost gave the delivery guy a 34 dollar tip. That high
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