I see lights
Your drunk and in times square. Time to take the 2 train home.
next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
I said make yourselves at home, not to put a used condom on my ceiling fan.
My neighbor is on the his front porch in a robe dipping a popsicle into what appears to be vodka. I want to be his son.
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
Where did this racoon skin hat, stop sign and bag full of tacos come from?
Narnia or $5 pitcher night either way
The doctor that gave me my std test is trying to hook me up with her daughter lol
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
I'm about to smoke a joint alone, do you want to FaceTime and pretend you're smoking it too?
I no longer need a flask. I need a canteen.
He literally ejaculated and I hit Uber
I just got yelled at by a stripper for being a tease.
Yes ma'am. I'm attracted to unconventional people, you know that.
True. I can't judge, half of my sexual partners I only know a false first name & a number. We all have our kinks.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
My FIANCE just told me he thought you were the prettiest out of all my friends YOU WHORE
Randomize
