Wish you were here....
And I wish your mouth was around my cock, but that never happens, does it?
He just helps fat girls get exercise. One walk of shame at a time.
he asked me if i would dance for him to make it easier for him to jack off. does that answer your question.
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Turned out not to be so bad. He had a big dick and i owed him for all the free beer over the year.
i told you that I felt like my feet were melting into the ground and you starting blowing on them to put out the "invisible fire". thanks friend.
i just feel like the statute of limitations for admitting i plowed through her car last night was up a couple hours ago
There should be a promo code on the Papa Johns website for "I have no moneys but if you send a cute delivery guy I will pay him in blow jobs."
So apparently nutella and chocolate body paint aren't actually the same thing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why is my vagina being sacrificed for yours? I'm sure he would take a piece of you too. Your turn.
woke up to find i out made out with his roommate before hooking up with him. breakfast was awkward to say the least
My fridge door just caught on fire somehow.
I moved to this city Tuesday and got laid Saturday. Still got it.
I shamewalked barefoot this morning and the Dos Equis delivery guy judged the shit out of me.
Best neighbors ever! They found the guy ive been wanting as a booty call and got me invited to the party the guy was at and gave me alcohol so i could be tipsy when met him. im never moving.
Randomize