What do you do when the person in the stall next to you says they're jealous?
seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
Its sad we have to plan out fun a month in advance. 30 sucks.
so I told him I hadn't been laid since Bush was president. Right after he cums, he says "Welcome to the Obama Administration".
High as balls & about to be tanning. Helloooo 15 minute vacay.
i DID try to find you last night. i asked where you were and you texted me the letter "e" and a picture of the dark.
Had a student tell me he misses the old Four Loko. He's in 7th grade. No one is allowed to claim I started drinking too young ever again.
Tonight's trip to the ER was brought to you by, "fork jousting."
I had to explain the gravity bong to my mom. Right after she pointed out I have a lot of dicks on my floor at any given moment.
If my penis could make facial expressions, it would constantly have a smile on.
the problem is i have six tabs of acid in my freezer and no self control
In all honesty the person most likely to secretly slip me drugs would be ... Me
sooo trippy being back in town after 5 years. if you had asked me in high school who would be future coke heads, i would have been way off
I'm not asking for life coaching, I'm just asking if you know where I left my underpants.
So this is how i'm celebrating Easter? By eating chicken nuggets and masturbating all day. What a life.
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