Katy Perry is on a Proactiv commercial. That "I kissed a girl" shit is so much less hot now.
how do i tell him I'm always in the mood without sounding like a slut?
Moms kinda upset I threw up in grandmas bedroom. I think ill stay in tonight.
Can you check your dirty laundry bag for my tooth.
Chinese roommate asked me this a.m when u left if all girls here have multiple boyfriends..
I'm not surprised. You have the libido of an Italian soccer team.
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
I found a half composed text to you this morning and all it said was HELP M. Is that how I ended up at the bottom of the stairwell in only a tee-shirt and one heel?
considering I never received the text I would go with 'yes'.
let's make a party pact right now just as precaution for this trip: ill make sure you don't piss yourself if you make sure I don't bang my cousins friends. deal?
And I'm determined to make an Eiffel Tower happen sometime. I just don't know who will take the pic (first world sex problem?)
I'm not gonna lie, my internet creeping skills scare me. I'm like Liam Neeson in Taken
I forgot about snapchatting a pic of us, but I remember flossing with your hair.
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
Is talking to an iron man poster a good or bad indicator that you've been drinking too much?
His PENIS is so fucking big that I always use caps, out of respect.
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