D3 body, D1 cock
Don't come here someone got drunk and rolled the keg to buger king. no more beeer
i called him pencil dick in front of over half of his fraternity brothers...
...never gotten so many high fives in my life! fuck ya i win!
You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
The mass text at 3:12AM offering "free scrotum tastings" will have repercussions
I left two shots of jager for you guys when you wake up from your death. Do with it as you wish
Kegstand on crutches, you need to get on my level.
It was relaxing until your penis crawled in my ear.
I never thought I would have to get vodka suctioned out of my ear
He was stoned laying on my bed singing I'm a little tea cup while I took a pregnancy test. Thank god it was negative.
Thanks for wearing matching bob ross shirts to the bar with me and referring to every guy as a happy little accident
Just don't let me do two things: Beer bongs filled with vodka or shot competitions
NOT PREGNANT HIGH FIVE!
So, 'head before the store' turned into a fuck fest, & that's how I ended up at the grocery store smelling like a cum farm on Black Friday. How's your weekend?
Not only is he funny, he had a REALLY big dick
He's old enough to be your father!
REALLY. BIG. DICK.
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