when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
to be honest..when i was little i used to think sharks can swim out of drains and eat people
According to Glamour magazine, experiencing sexual pleasure helps you live longer. I am dying an early death.
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
The liquor store guy just accused me of buying alcohol of minors due to how many bottles I got. The guy should be used to this from me.
OH BABY IM HERE AND IN A BLANKET FORT
COME TO THE BLANKET FORT
It's like refusing a bong hit from michael phelps... You just can't do it
I praised you last night for winning a chug off...you thanked me with a ridiculously hard headbutt. Thanks dick.
the conference was great. we had to hide the acid in a planter in front of the department of agriculture though
How is it medically possible for my urine to smell like espresso
I am so sorry. Not sure for what, but whatever I did last night probably merits an apology, so I'm covering my bases.
The uber man and I sat in silence. With my underwear in my purse and my dress shoved in the pocket of the hoodie the guy gave me.
he's like the highest ranking tongue wizard i know.
just realized I'll be in a check out line with just Hershey syrup and condoms. I don't know if I am setting a good image for our generation
She shit herself again. We're calling her the "Queen of Sharts".
Randomize
