My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
i can barely afford taco bell don't think a baby is in the budget
and then we had to stop you from trying to pour shots through your nose with the neti pot.
Without me, you would never be able to say you partied with a midget!
pretty sure if my vagina had a mouth, it would have been smiling afterwards.
bong water from a few floors above me just splashed onto my face when i was looking out the window. Happy 4/21 to me
but you must be fair and judge his penis by normal penis standards and not let your vision be clouded by the rare gem of a penis you have recently encountered
The black hole just entered the party man, I can literally see guys starting to move towards her.
I may not have eyeballs after all the drunk naked people having sex outside.
It's pathetic. My bed hasn't been this sexless since it was in bedmart.
Using the only finger i can move, i calculated body mass, intake and time. It's mathematically impossible for me to still have this hangover at 9pm. I passed out at 8pm last night. Fuck vodka.
But really- as the voice of your vagina I am BEGGING you to do it. If not for yourself than for your poor innocent puss
oh my god. picked the worst day ever to not wear underwear...
I'm just gonna stop you right there because there is, in fact, no such thing.
I swear to god if you keep eating my cats food drunk I am going to kick you out of our apartment.
I was so drunk I asked my mom if she had always been my mom or if it was someone else for a while
Randomize
