is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
im going to have to ask you to stop vomiting stars, rainbows, and butterflies all over your facebook statuses...
dude, I just walked in on your little brother changing clothes...I'm ashamed to say I noticed, but that kid has as MASSIVE cock...
Yeah...we all know. it's the elephant in the room at family gatherings.
that is a frighteningly accurate metaphor for it.
Just heard an advertisement for 40 proof chocolate milk. We may never have to grow up
I'm genuinely dissapointed that we didn't make any fat chicks cry
She suggested that I come visit her in Europe and hook up with the heteroflexible Korean who sits next to her in class. Polylove is the best love.
At one point last night I over heard you say " I'm gonna puke in a bag and pour it down your throat" I LOVE YOU.
I'm eating cake, naked, in bed. I am GREAT at being single.
I was looking at our sex bingo and pretty much every single row or column has at least one kind of person that is harder to find than all the rest
We've made things harder for ourselves
The struggle will be part of the fun
Dude I'm at a Marijuana dispensary party. They are giving away BAGS of edibles
How do you keep ending up in these situations?
My dad is their accountant
Night one million where I have madri gra beads around my neck and no justifiable reason for where they came from
Christ I forgot how flexible you need to be for a decent sext pic. Jesus.
I shouldn't have to tell you to stop throwing knives at me.
I smell like cotton candy and guilt.
Randomize
