you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
just saw my sister at the strip club... dont think she's "taking a night class over the summer"
Fuck him tonight for the both of us. We're still tag-teaming in spirit.
The fact you even thought licking it would fix it boggles my mind
Well it worked
Not the point
i just ate a whole pizza and threw it back up in the time span of 13 minutes. give me the number to guiness book of world records.
Explain to me how "cheap asian titties" is a complement?
Dude I was taking a shower and I kept looking down at the drain expecting Mario to come up, yell "It's a me, Mario!", tickle my balls, and go back down the drain.
The cabbie told me fat girls shouldn't wear tight clothes, and that he feels bad for the guys that have to be underneath them, especially because their positions are "very limited" and proceeded to ask me if I had a trash can and if I could throw something away for him. Don't worry though, he promised it wasn't anything "bad". He then handed me a tied up grocery bag with a bunch of wadded up Kleenex that weighed about 3 pounds. To answer your question, yes I made it home. Fml
Omg. I have a story to tell you later about that girl that just crawled on stage
He put himself in the friend zone by calling me dude all night so I blew his friend. Judge me.
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
Typical Sunday morning text...are you alive?
I should be in a better mood, I just went home and had a quickie on my lunch break.
I had a sandwich.
did he think i wouldnt notice the naked girl in the backseat
He woke me with blue berry pancakes and a blow job. He's a keeper.
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