I like to use the word "seasoned" over "slutty", you know, like a good curly fry
You know you're hung over when your pose in art class is lying face down on the platform
My living room is scattered with glow sticks wrappers, sparklers, face paint & beer cans?
It's not as cool looking when the drugs wear off, is it?
Wtf just happened. Thought you were in my bed since 3am, turned out I was sharing it w/a drunk girl from the 6th floor lounge...
Yeah, you're right, it's a conspiracy against you. This small tight knit group of people who don't like assholes.
Can we make a pact that if we're 40 and still sluts that aren't married we can get civil unioned the fuck up and raise an asian baby as our own?
the old man that you threw the shoe at says "hi" and many rude words...
IM DRINK YORE HIFH WE ARE POSTERCHOLD OF AMERICA
So when I eventually, if ever, find someone I'd like to marry, do you think having people fly to africa for a lion king themed wedding is too much?
Then you bent down and whispered, "excuse me mr. Stair, could you please stop moving?"
Possibly having a threesome with my ex boyfriend and his current girlfriend was great closure on that subject
I'm drinking coffee out of a pasta sauce jar and eating fruit soaked in Smirnoff. I think I've hit rock bottom.
Packing for college has become a game of where did I hide my sex toys.
I'm on A4A looking at dick pics while the CEO is on the phone trying to convince me not to leave the company
God gave you your own nipples for a reason.
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