just checked my call log and realized that we talked for 3 mns. what did i say for that long?
pretty standard. you have fun last night?
apparently....what exactly does 'pretty standard' mean?
typical hot then cold, followed by a death threat.
who let me buy 6 packs of big league chew? and eat them all? thats not cool
we're going to dress like we're asking for it, because we are
I'm not going to need your "it doesn't mean you're a slut" pep talk after all.
Just got a blowjob on the pier where my great-grandfather entered America.
Anything that comes outta your cooch is bound to be breathtaking
That could use a little rephrasing
Theme for your birthday? Beer olympics in S&M costumes? Sounds like a nice little saturday
i wish i just like had a pee bag attached to me and i could just go whenever i want wherever i want
I probably should have eaten more before I started shotgunning beers at 9am, but it was so much damn fun.
I want to show up to tomorrow's study group looking like I got hit by a train. A train made of dicks.
Ok because I want to set a new world record for how fast I can drink away my Christmas money
Alas my dad DD'd me. Legit cock blocked to the highest degree
this party is nice, but i have to go home and cry over anime in order to fill my daily quota of suffering
so... i have a picture of you and three other girls making kissy faces at this giant stuffed banana you're holding. however, you seem to be violently screaming at it.
Those bitches did NOT have my back.
whole 5th of capt = waking up in the shower after 2 hours and the whole house asking why i'm STILL in a towel. and me having nothing to say
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