i just caught my roommate coming out of the bathroom half naked with a surge protector. he told me he didn't wanna talk about it.
finally nailed that neighbor chick. hopefully i can get her wireless password now. free internet trumps moral standards any day
Ya! She had a north face on tho so she was a classy hooker.
Just got an Edible Arrangement my parents sent me for my birthday. Time to marinate some fruit in vodka.
he's from indiana, of course he's clueless about "g-spots"
The guys had to come into the bar bathroom and pep talk us all off the floor
You may see me wearing your shirt to class. It's because I still have the spins and I'm anticipating throwing up on it. Asshole.
Nm. Exausted and my teeth just fell out again
Archery is over so let's go back to not giving a fuck for the next 3 years and 11 months
Can we go to the gas station to get cigarettes before we get drunk. It's hard enough to say Marlboro sober.
He wore socks while I was giving him head. I couldn't even focus on his penis because of the socks.
He just used the word frick. Is that a possible red flag?
you asked the cab driver if he wanted to meet your parents, last night.
She started calling me daddy on the second date and I don't know how to react to that
I just wanna be naked and go frolic in the snow
Randomize
