Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
I don't think ill make it tonight the floor wont let me walk
if I'm ever single again, I swear to god I'm going to have 87 venerial diseases
Thanks for making me watch you dance provacatively by yourself in the bathroom so you could see if you looked fat.
our school mascot just walked into class and threw condoms everywhere. welcome to college
Sorry, can't come over. I have to spend time with my niece. Her Dad ignores her and I don't want her to have male attention issues like you.
How was the bike ride?
Nope. High in the basement. Fruit cups.
there was some random girl that nobody really knew, standing in the corner trying to shave her armpits with a plastic butter knife.
You kept me hostage in your driveway until you got your point across that alaska has warm weather
Although I would ideally cut back on smoking weed, imagine what getting high and looking for our spirit animals would be like
Come to the roof. We are drinking breakfast.
My day went from bad to worse when I realized I puked out my second floor window last night.
I apparently got up in the middle of the night after fucking him and started looking for you under piles of his clothing
Ive never seen a drunk man get suplexed before last week, now its the standard requirement every time we go out.
We went camping and met these lesbians and now I have S'mores where there shouldn't be S'mores.
Randomize