she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
Woke up this morning on my couch at 6am fully dressed including heels, holding half a corn dog. I called you last night when I was buying the corn dog from a street vendor, I think.
I am in love with you.
well on a positive note i hear those vitamins you take while pregnant do wonders for your nails
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He managed to scream "cowabunga bitch" before he went down on me. Let me know if you still like him.
Come over. Drunk tacos.
That isn't even a sentence.
I kept the important parts.
I dont feel as bad coming home this baked because I gave my 14 year old sister a no drugs talk last night.
so i guess now we know you can get away with peeing mere feet from the Capitol if you shout IM PREGNANT at the guards
You'd think, but when you nail one sorority sister, you might as well have nailed them all.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i am bringing shame upon my ancesors with my weak liver valhalla will never accept me
Well I guess I'll go shower now and wash all the stripper off.
I'm smoking a bowl in my bathtub. I'm meant to be alone.
Don't shower too much, need the shame to be fresh to get the best story
I just saw a girl on the phone crying and eating a sandwich. Thats talent right there.
I'm laying backwards. On the stairs. Eating carrots. And drinking from a captain Morgan bottle.
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