we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
Hmm. I hear gunshots, car horns blaring, hear drunk white people screaming, and see about fifty status updates pertaining to the hawks. I guess they won.
Oh we will ALWAYS be together. Or I'll have to delete my Facebook altogether. I've drunkenly boobie trapped photos of us into every album. There's no way I'd ever have the patience to go through that deletion process.
Nothing like moscato in your sinuses tobmake your night complete
She thinks I come over for the sex, but I really come for the snacks.
Convincing a cop that you have diplomatic immunity is way harder in Dallas than in Serbia. And you get fined for attempted bribery.
I just remember her dragging me inside in a panic saying we needed mentos and popcorn I have no fucking clue how we ended up asleep in her closet.
It's a drunk scavenger hunt.
Everything on the list counts for double points if done naked.
I actually want to work out for some reason... I think it's my brains way of telling me it doesn't like living in a fat body.
Oh, also as a concerning side note, my bra had drops of blood on it. So I don't know what the deal was, but someone I was around was definitely bleeding a decent amount.
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
Considering who their parents are, maybe you should use vodka for the baptism.
I love you. Go after that dick
Did you clean my apartment?
I thought it was a dream, I'm sorry
Please stay more often
One can only be this extremely wet once a year and I feel like I'm bitch slapping god by not using this gift he has bestowed on me.
Randomize