If you die in college, do you die in real life?
you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
so apparently i worked out for over an hour last night. drinking is the only way i will ever get anything done
Unless you can cure my hangover with your penis I'm not interested.
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
Your favorite boobs are sending you seasons greetings
the kid next to me in math class is drawing gay porn. it's good, but that is beside the point
THEY HAVE BEEN GOING AT IT FOR 2 HOURS AND I HEAR THEM BANGING THIS IS BULLSHIT
One day no one will want to send me dick pics so by all means keep 'em coming
Never let your siblings swipe right.
Apparently stoned me thought eating chips in the shower was a good idea.
Right. He was like "I'll be here all night if I have to..." I was like "Well then, I'll have to call the cops..."
You set a couch on fire in my brothers backyard?
Just the cushions
I just came in my own mouth don't ask me how cuz it really hurt and felt good at the same time.
100000% expect a picture of my ass in them
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