i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
Michelle found a bong in the garbage and sold it to my mom
is it weird that i feel like i won the break up because my status change got two comments and his got zero?
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
her bf's celebrating 10 yrs of service at kfc...it's safe to say all the good men are taken
Just so you're aware, tomorrow is "Slow Clap when you see Mike" day.
I left myself a trail of jello shots, that ended at his door. OR maybe he left me a trail of jello shots at his door. DO I GO IN!?
Do you think I threw out my left shoulder during the keg stand or the stripper pole? It's medically relevant my chiropractor wants to know.
I look like slutty woodland creatures dress me in the morning. Everybody's got problems.
Court can wait. right now you and your magic penis need to be here satisfying me.
Bro you fell face first into the sand and then balled up into the fetal position and yelled help untill I picked you up, no more whiskey for you...
Somehow, you looked so classy chugging that bottle of wine last night.
I woke up and couldn't find her. She had somehow managed to get into the closet and lock herself in. She was crying for her boyfriend. Thirsty Thursday at its finest
She won't let me meet her hot new boy toy just because she thinks it'll lead to us having a threesome. It's not fair. I thought we were friends...
Randomize
