This girl is more easily done than said...
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
You have to understand, this is the first time I'm looking at a whopper sober.
I really super glued a paper bow tie to my body last night. I need to do less drugs.
Awesome. My fame will spread to DC... As will the herpes.
My dealer threw in a "freestyle rap" today with my purchase. I dont know if I can handle this relationship.
Oh we're fine. I made her a "sorry I peed on you" omelet.
Hypothetical Question: Would you take a cougar bullet for me?
i wish i just like had a pee bag attached to me and i could just go whenever i want wherever i want
That's totally the Emoji for "just ran into some girl who knows I know she had an abortion"
I really hope you didn't eat the bowl of melted vanilla ice cream I left on the coffee table. Because it is not melted vanilla ice cream.
Crying on the toilet and taking a shit. This is what being an adult is about
Basically I will actually need a reindeer pulled sleigh to make it to all the penises in one night.
He slapped my ass... He best ask me out. Or figure out how to unslap my ass.
I'm a delicate orchid of a man.
Blossoming into a fierce dragon.
Randomize
