Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
we have a love-hate relationship...we love having sex but hate waking up next to eachother
I am going to be the most sexually active ladybug that he has ever seen
My body has become completely dependent on Text Twist. I can't poop without it.
what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
Awww, you two will make beautiful abortions together...
Just saw some guy puking out of the dorm window, its for sure monday
Just rolled over and found your boyfriend in bed with me. Is mine at your house?
we made out at a charity event. really i was helping the fight against aids...
she fascinated with the iron the back of the toilet seat. she made me sit in the bathroom with her for a solid 10 minutes while she just stared and laughed at it
I'm starting to think my role in the world is to inject batshit crazy, mentally unbalanced chicks with a dose of normal sperm.
Also, you need to stop getting hammered and taking showers with people.
I just made my dating life into my own game show. would you like to meet the contestants? (photos not included)
Just got home from work. I'm going to change into sweats for a while before I have to wear normal pants to the party like I promised.
My roommate just yelled at me for coughing. I'd like to yell at her for doing lines off our counter last night.
Randomize
