kyle and i were puking, simultaneously, off the front porch at 4 am, and in the middle of it he looks up, reaches his hand over, and says "knucks." And then I proceeded to fist bump him. By farrr the best time I've ever had puking.
he started drinking at 9am with grey goose and pancakes. He IS my hero.
Just saw a dude hanging out a window upside down chugging a 60 of vodka. This weekend is big for everyone I guess
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
HOLY SHIT HE'S TRYING TO EAT HIS FOOT. THIS IS THE BEST DAY OF MY LIFE.
one night of dollar margs at dinner and dollar beers at the bar later, i am throwing up in his shower and gurgling soap and water to kill the taste of sin in my mouth. dollar days need to stop endng like this.
The "don't get cum on anything" rule also applies to my furniture and scarves
That's not technology. Doesn't count.
This is what happens when you live with someone you met on Grindr
I have to be more responsible. I've dropped three lighters into my bong today.
Was it just me or did you also find it awkward when "glad you came" started playing on pandora right after you finished?
Can I borrow you for, like, thirty minutes so you can lay on one boob and rub the other until I fall asleep?
Dude, you kicked in the door to get to a six-person orgy while yelling "I JUST WANT TO LEARN!!"
Is it something I'm going to want to hug you for or slap you for?
nothing like a long car ride to make you think of all the bad things you've done
Say thank you and give him a blowjob.
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