how many beers do i need before it is acceptable to sleep with sam
enough that when i make fun of you for it tomorrow you wont even remember it happening
eric is really sick so I'm taking care of him! :(
just blow him with soup in your mouth.
Stop. He threw up in front of Madison Square Garden security. Spit at the guys feet and grunted ughhh at him.
i figure if i show enough tits, no one will notice my eyebrows.
do you know where my other puke covered boot is
There's a chance I told a cop that I was ready for him to strip I may have even taken some ones out of my purse and stuck them in his holster
I'm not saying I haven't been that drunk. I'm just saying I haven't been that drunk and then have cops buy me shots.
Trying to put a fitted sheet on drunk is one of the boss levels of slutty adulthood.
Dad's teaching me to make moonshine this weekend as "college prep". How scared should I be sis?
WHAT IF I SAT OUTSIDE AND STARTED SCREAMING THE LYRICS TO O CANADA WOULD THAT FIX IT
PLEASE DON'T
I felt like I was having sex with Joffrey from Game of Thrones. Needless to say how bad it was
Self reach around competition is what the Olympics has been missing all along. A true test of athleticism.
We're listening to drake in the middle of the woods and smoking two joints at once...my life is complete.
Does fucking him in the back of the car with the sun roof retracted count as star gazing?
Dammit. the window insulation sheets are too small for my windows. Yet again I am disappointed by size
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