Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
that blow job was not worth the clinginess that will follow
i'm getting the "you hooked up with my friends" speech from him. i'm returning with the "gotta keep my quota up" speech
they won't let me drive with my sombrero
I found what appears to be half an E pill and part of a tooth in my pocket this morning
Unemployment check just came in. As soon as I stop pretending I have morals I'm buying weed. Puff puff pass uncle sam.
I just found out that I slept with Kate Gosselin's publicist back in June . Brb I have to wash myself endlessly.
Hey, if I can't get it and you're still alive, can you get the glass out of my foot? Happy Sunday.
Seeing Grandma lick chocolate sauce off of the male stripper was definitely not the way I planned to enter the world of legal drinking.
On another note, I feel like my vagina is slowly being peeled off with a rusty potato peeler.
What conversation warrents "penis" in rainbow comic sans
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