Totally saw a hot amputee. I think this is called character growth.
just got pizza delivered to the hot tub. its easier than i thought to be this lazy
so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
Vodka @ 9pm. Library. Nothing can go wrong, I promise.
It's like my ice maker knows when I wanna get drunk
Its 6:30 and I'm shotguning a busch ice while taking a shit. Outlook for work today: interesting
Fair warning: We've transformed the living room into a giant tent.
I don't think there was a moment this weekend where grey goose did not course through my veins
Dude made his own urinal by punching a hole in the wall and pissing in it rather than waiting in line. That is the stuff of legends.
I was woken up in my old house by the new residents ... I don't even have a Key anymore
Omg this place. I'm at a neighborhood party. My mom has kissed two other moms. Where am I
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
still can't believe dude took a personal call while he was balls deep in my mouth.
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
Randomize
