I'm at some bar in brklyn... just made out with a guy named Owen.
He is a pre-school teacher... just sang me a song about weather.
I woke up naked by my window. blinds open. smiley face drawn on my window.
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
i am positive it's ok to drink. it's just pieces of the plastic knife i forgot was in the blender.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
ok, she started talking about how she swears her step dad killed her mom. starting to back out of this one
Fuck that. I will get OUT of CONTROL And rise from a hangover on Sunday like Jesus himself.
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
I woke up this morning to find a stuffed animal submerged in the toilet. I'm not entirely sure if it was the cat or Kara.
This is what happens when wu tang raised you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He offered to take my unemployed self out for drinks, but I really just want him to buy me the Beyoncé album
I told you you to bring something to share....you brought tequila and a condom
It's nice out. . But after I almost put a bag of chips in the microwave to make nachos. ..I figured it best to not venture too far from the couch
Well, you're 18 and dating a 28 year old. Who has a wife. Who isn't you. I would guess that's why your mom frowns upon the relationship.
Dude, I got drunk and sexted his little sister by accident
Just a little. Like do I say "hey I'm the girl that's fucking your son, nice to meet you"
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