the beds are so narrow its like a jenga threesome
i cant be the least bit upset about his new gf cause all i think is that she has to put things in his ass
what do 4 police cars, 1 ambulence, and 2 fire truycks have in common?.... My driveway
Every now and then I'll talk to a creeper for an extended amount of time. Randy, for instance, funded our entire night of horrible decisions.
i cant believe i hit a parked car with a pink dildo in my mouth... fuckin epic
Whenever I said your name you screamed polo and did another shot.
no. it doesnt count as road head if youre parked
She walked in on her brother jacking off and she hasn't been the same since. She's been crying and shaking non-stop. It's been two weeks.
Ughhhh. Finnnneeeeee. I'll have sex with your brother. Sheesh. The things I do for you woman.
Holy fucking shit the worst thing for a hangover ever--A FUCKING BOLLYWOOD MOVIE BLARING IN CLASS
I think he bit my vagina. Who does that?
He suffocated between her tits, but she didn't notice because he still came.
She wanted to get out of there before you guys woke up so she wouldn't let me find my underwear. Lol So I apologize to whoever finds that in your room.
My theme for the night was drink diego drink! Unfortunately Dora was not there to navigate me to the bathroom
Nothing much. Just taking shots of tequila before I go get a bikkini wax. You?
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