I think horse shit smells the best of all shits.
there is a dude in the bar with no arms getting fed beers by his friends
I started making my dollar bills into rings for the strippers
he just asked if we wanted to go to an arts and crats club with him tomorrow. every day it becomes harder for me to defend his sexuality
He motorboated me, gave me a business card that said congratulations on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
There was a tour on campus today, and there were two girls i went to high school with in the group. They saw me and ran up to me as i was unlocking my door. when i opened it, kate was laying in a pile of glitter and beer cans. We need to reevaluate.
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
He's ninety percent amazing leader, brother, and teacher, and ten percent unforgivable douche. These are the men I look up to in my life.
I saw a classic trojan enz laying on his desk. So he's probably not into the kinky shit.
You give an incredible blow job. I wanted to make sure you know it was appreciated
I'm definitely single now but she stole my mailbox
not sure what stings more, my ass or my pride...
Why am I a human magnet for the worst dicks of the world?
my mom just came into my room and handed me a news paper article about women on the verge of a drinking problem... i can already tell its not about to be sunday funday
Anyone who does not know who Paul McCartney is does NOT get to put hands in my pants
Randomize
