i chose cheese fries over sex for the third time this week.
We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
I went with the blow up doll and I'm glad I did.
dude.. you lit a cigarette on the bus and told the driver it was okay because you were fire marshall of your boy scout troop
I understand Curling. That high.
if that dog is afraid of alcohol then he's no dog of mine
Just looked at my outgoing calls. Seems I had a 7 minute convo with my 10th grade english teacher at 2:56 am Saturday...
So it looks like you may be an uncle real soon. Don't ask how I feel about it and don't text me back.
The heart of my unhappiness in my job is that it's not a place where coworkers and I can draw dicks on everything to amuse each other
Last thing I ever expected to say, "Get your finger out of my ear or I will stop sucking your dick."
I apparantly wanted to name her baby garbage
I truly just stopped puking in my 730 am calculus class, looked up, corrected my professor, then resumed puking my eyes out. He was both impressed and disgusted.
Yeah sorry about that. I got pulled into the Russian student society's end of term party. There was too much vodka and eurodance to come help you pack.
Ask me who hasn't showered since Sunday and just got cruised at the gas station on his way to work. I'm a terrible gay.
I want to be a supportive friend to her, but I also want to sleep with her ex now that he's single.
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