But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
did you ever find your cell phone? and your dignity?
So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
he just kept saying that he had liquor dick..then he tried to fuck me without removing his pants.
Whyyyyy do my fingers smell like Chinese food.
her orgasm sounded like a fucking walrus crying.
his cum tasted like old pizza and looked like old milk
We were all singing so you said you were going to play a percussion instrument... the crackers.
Evidently I told a girl she should leave the bar because no one wanted to fuck her.
So high I started thinking my desktop picture of a cat was too erotic for the workplace.
I was stalking his twitter and saw that he used punctuation in a hashtag. Thank god we didn't work out because I can't be with someone that incompetent
U touched your head and and said "oh look blood" and then looked at me and touched my face... And said war paint
She took all the bottles out of the shower caddy and replaced them with booze. I just made a shower Manhatten. Imma marry this one.
Randomize