Bullshit. I know you're watching The Dog Whisperer
That Cesar Milan is captivating
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
Okay my swimming class is like the fatass/diabetic guide to losing 2 pounds by christmas
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
4pm on a Sunday....roomate fucking like a wildabeast while I have a organic chemistry study group in my kitchen.
Somehow ed fucked carrie while purposely not saying a single word to her all night. He just nodded and smiled.
Would it have been easier if he talked to her?
Yeah, but i bet him he couldn't do it. Now he gets a free taco bell combo of his choosing.
The number of injuries I get impersonating Shakira while drunk is getting ridiculous. Sprained vagina, dude.
He asked me if I wanted to play "Edouard Mandevan," turns out that's French for Edward Winehands
How do I tell her I need the lights out when I'm getting head because she and my mom share a perm color
Well I think I made it pretty obvious I wasn't in to it. I was drinking a beer while he was going down in me
how do you ask an olympian for your underwear back?
Made it just outside my dorm and yack on the front dirt. Wave to a dad thats staring, continue on my way.
I would rather you cheat on me then you watch this season of Breaking Bad without me.
I'm a stupid stupid woman who is totally going to rock this holiday season dick drunk on that Ginger
dude if looks could fuck you two would've been naked in front of everybody
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