I least I know I can't get pregnant because it's on my hair
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
some guy just pulled a dress out of a fax machine...I have no idea what the hell is going on
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
this is really not the time to pretend we have morals
Give me a few hours to remember what being sober feels like.
U shoulda just taken her to a stall and banged her and let me watch the game. Some friend u r.
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
He said he had bite marks on his back... Turns out he had to throw me over his shoulder, and I was really reluctant.
my mouth is as dry as a post-menopausal camel on antidepressant's vagina.
Why the hell did you smack that girls beer out of her hand at the end of the night then buy her a double jack and coke for?
Its called bad cop laid cop.
Haha keeping the dream alive until Chinese New Year. I'm jobless with stitches in my face.
You ever sit back and realize our friendship is based off us ranting at each other with random animal photos thrown in
One of the worst parts about living at my parents again is trying to hide how often I'm hungover, just quietly puked in the basement bathroom while my mom got ready for work
Woke up with a glow stick in my boobs this morning. Must've dominated Sunday.
Randomize
