no really all good couples have similar hair colors!
the last thing i remember was trying to convince him to call over his girlfriend so we could have a threesome
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
Just got back from fathers day breakfast. So hungover i couldn't eat so i just slipped my food in my pockets and threw it out while i puked in the bathroom.
we got kicked out of McDonald's because you kept screaming THAT SHIT CRAY at the woman in front of us because she ordered a fish filet.
...that shit cray.
One of the guys I danced with wanted to give me his number so I convinced him I had a photographic memory and that I would remember it.
I got about 15 snapchats from you with your hand saying "you want cheese sticks" or something like that and one of some weird looking weed
Just drove by where I lost my sausage gravy virginity
Thanks for that golden cinnamony goodness that flowed from your fake tits last night haha
I just want to dump glitter on my floor and roll in it like a cat in catnip.
I think you should do the fixer upper relationship. Like lawyers do pro bono work with underserved populations, you can do pro bono relationship work.
well i maturbated this morning, which means the best part of my day has already happened.
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
Let me atleast have my coffee before you start talking about your penis
Why does my mask smell like doritoes?
Randomize
