i just saw a guy carrying a medieval times commemerative glass filled with vomit.. there were 2 people cheering him from behind
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
Nothing like a little anal leakage to start off Sunday morning. Can't decide if that speaks well of my weekend or not...
It hits you later. Like when you wake up on the floor under a puzzle later.
Obviously. I'm here to let you eat things off my boobs and help you get laid.
Seriously can I go through one convo where masturbating doesn't come up
Just had ice cream and a blow job come together in one glorious, defining moment.
My tongue is raw from licking all that salt with my tequila shots...happy cinco de mayo
So, Cheetos don't microwave great.
it's pizza time hurry your sexcapades
I'm sorry about the spring break comment. I won't make anymore pornos, I promise.
I got outsmarted by a door tonight. Twice.
Just motorboated this 18 year old girl at the bar. The first time was my idea the other 3 she made me. Maybe turning 27 won't be so bad. Haha.
I party with great urgency now.
It feels weird going to sleep without hugging the toilet goodnight
Randomize