I realized today that I should stop thinking so much with my vagina instead of my brain.
Please tell me this doesn't mean another "surprise road trip" where I spend all my money on gas and the SURPRISE destination is the abortion clinic.
But what if I pay for the gas?
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
You'll be the guy with the raft that sells burritos on the river. You'd be legendary.
Anytime you have a hot, flirty, married woman that wants to ride you like a horse and slap your ass, you've got to do it.
Yeah, but four times?
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
I did too many shots and now a kitten is trying to eat my bagel.
crossing my fingers that hitting golf balls off my pourch was a dream and not something that actaculy happened
I set up her keyboard so that no matter what she does, it will open up RedTube. Click and command Q all you like, its going to porn. No I play the waiting game
You know you're a fat kid when you've spent half the day having a twitter conversation with Pizza Hut.
i just honestly didn't believe you when you said your brother was a fucking clown. ho shit you weren't kidding.
I should send him a pic of my crotch with the caption "thanks for the memories"
But wait then while giving his drive thru order he goes in mid sentence, "Hey baby it's Travis remember me?"
I don't need to know how horny your mother is, hun.
That's actually very serious....I really do think of you whenever is see pizza
Nothing wrong with a little cat scratch fever. You have toys?
A few, plus a dildo molded from a porn star that I've always been too intimidated of to actually use, but it's the apocalypse, and momma didn't raise no quitter.
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