This girl is more easily done than said...
Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
a queef is a wish your heart makes.
that girl looks like she smells like hot dog water...
So I feel really bad about last night...can i give you a blow job and we call it even?
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
we're going to drop off one of our cars at the police station tonight so we'll be able to drive home in the morning
Well. I have your keys. You have my car. Looks like we have a drunkxican standoff.
My dick was almost in plain McDonald's sight
I just want to let you know that when you try and lie about the "solid 10" you brought home last night, I've got a picture of her and about 10 reasons you should have left her at the bar starting with those martin scorsese eyebrows.
You are COMPLAINING that the sex was too good. You're not getting any sympathy from me
Dude. Cvs sells sex toys. And my discount works on them. Game on.
My gut feeling that we had reached a new level of intimacy last night was confirmed early this morning when you sleep farted on penis.
Sext: Bring me pancakes from the midnight breakfast gathering please
Hooked up with another cop last night. Think I am renaming my vagina "dispatch"
Randomize
