Midget sex pt 2 tonight
OH RELAX, IT WAS PITY SEX.....
You know if a vagina was a face, it'd be ugly as hell...
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
She texted me and said she was fingering herself. Don't respond to this because she's the perfect girl. I'd love to smell her cell phone after that.
I assume you meant to text someone else on your contact list instead of your own mother...
I want to frame my negative pregnancy test.
We can talk tomorrow when we're both alert. My mind is somewhere else right now.
Where's it at?
In your pants.
Just woke up with three stitches in my left boob. Nevertheless, I think I'm going to like this school.
Does the blue bra belong to your sister or cousin?
drunk guy next to me on the train just tried to share his pizza with me
he just tried to feed it to me...i love new york
From time to time I think I'm happy for a second and then I remember how a guy stopped me from giving him head on my birthday weekend.
Why is there a chocalet milkshake outside our front door?
Alcohol
I see the guy who's been trying to get me to let him eat my ass became engaged on Facebook today; would framed screen shots be an appropriate wedding present?
We literally laid down in the back of my car and had sex in a parking lot and it was in the top 3 best moral-less decisions I've made.
I just want to feed you taquitos and play with your boner and live happily ever after
Randomize
