No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
All I heard was "I swear it'll be funny" and then we were in jail.
Reading my bank statement stoned makes me feel like an adult.
I just want you to know that we eye fucked the shit out of someone who just got drafted
ok is that genuinely the first four bars of mozart's symphony #40 sharpied onto my arm or
It's one of those things you just need to see in person at least once in your life. Like Niagara falls or some shit. His ass is the Niagara falls of asses
God I need to stop before there's a picture of my dick on my mom's phone.
Like we were literally doing coke off his insulin pump
Dude... She just sent me a story of how she wants to fuck me on a boat and call me her captain.. Well ahoy mateys, lets set sail
I last recall trying to play piano and asking justin for drugs. I would like to think I then gracefully laid down on the couch and shut my eyes like a sleeping kitten.
She said to me, without hesitation, "make me an offer better than my sugar daddy and I'll go with you"
sorry there isn't a 'perfect ass' emoji
I asked him to change the channel. There was no way I could do reverse cowgirl with golf on.
I don't mean to alarm you but are the strongest testicles in the family. I just learned I can lift 90 lb with my balls! Beat that.
Randomize
