a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
and then when she swallowed her birth control with a shot of vodka and looked in my direction, i knew it was time to go.
He kissed my cheek and I could smell it the whole way home like shit
What's the most polite way to ask if you puked in my vase?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh please tell me that I'm sleeping in your shower and not the neighbor's again
We blazed in her bathtub. All 5 of us. Not easy bro
You force fed me chocolate chips and avocados for 3 hours and kept asking me about my trip to sweden when I was 4.
She said " I'm going to get her back one day soon for putting extacy in my pop while I drove her to whislter" just a heads up.
I was fucking trucked by the swat team last night on State Street after UK won. But I got a picture with the guy afterwards so I forgive him
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ones vagina should not have the same slogan as a can of Pringles.
Seriously, it's 5am. STOP CREEPIN and START SLEEPIN!
I think I died and satan has brought me back to life and I'm paying for my sins with this hangover
My hot gay tattoo artist grew a beard and I'm not taking it well.
sometimes i just have a bad day n consider lowering my standards
My boss is paying me to come clean his house in a maid outfit and told me not to tell anyone....this is shady as fuck but I need the money
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