I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
I cant go down on him yet. All ive had to eat is olives and percocet. semen would only add to tomorow mornings discomfort.
I think id rather eat ped egg shavings.
He told me he could read braille... with his tongue. So I took him home. I don't think he was lying
just walked past a girl in her cap and gown puking her brains out beside a tree. her friends were taking pictures of her.
that bitch in the red sedan is still teasing me with the ice cream cone. i'm going to show her my dick
Ice cream after masturbating>masturbating any other time
No he exists. Who else tells me no matter how drunk I am to pull out. He's watching over me so my bastard doesn't get created.
And I don't know if this is really ESP, or just a crazy feeling, but I'm pretty sure he has an std. Or at least a cold.
I only had ten dollars. So leave it to Katie to somehow makeout with the bartender, on his shift mind you, and get free drinks.
So the guy I hooked up with during welcome week just tried to booty call me from across the lecture hall at 9am. I don't think he gets how this works...
I decided to start over my porn collection by deleting the old stuff. That was a sad piece of a pie chart...
I was masturbating and a roofer walked past my bedroom window.
I went home with him again and he LEFT HIS OWN HOUSE at 2 in the morning while I was IN THE BATHROOM.
i opened the door and you were passed out on my doorstep wearing ugly shorts and cuddling a pinnapple, i dont know what happened to you.
Randomize
