wakey wakey hands off snakey
Yeah, I tried playing the "see how long he can stay inside of me" game.. And I lost.
next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
recess is on disney at 4 in the morning, insomnia has never been so rewarding
I caught a rooster roaming Edison Park then released it in the bar. They made me try to catch it again and somebody played the chicken dance while I chased it
Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
I have no valid justification for peeing in your kitchen, but I don't think it's worth breaking up over.
Idgaf if he's a manwhore, he's like the mt. everest of penises. howcan I NOT try to put that inside me?
he paid for dinner at the eiffel tower. drinks at a bar on the champs elysees. gave me a motorcycle ride back to his house, got us heineken and then took me to park overlooking paris. where he ate me out on a park bench. still have doubts about the french?
Ok so now that we've actually had sex do I get the last name or are u really witness protection status?
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
I woke up this morning to a lot of blurry photos of a swan i must have chased down the riverbank and a handbag full of loose haribo.
Woke up in the ER with a nurse holding my tongue together inside of my mouth and a shattered jaw, the last thing I remember is opening the 151, care to fill me in?
Friends don't let friends go vibrator shopping alone.
Sooo does anyone wanna tell me why I threw up a cigarette this morning?
OMG YOU DID TO?!
Randomize
