Just saw some girl biking on campus with a babyseat on the front. Baby included. Do you know how many points that'd be worth?
Me and a lesbian played "may the best man win" over a bi chick tonight... I lost, still fun though
See, not all bad decisions involve my penis.
A baby just go on our party bus. What. The. Fuck.
Just found a partially digested mushroom under my bed. Thanks for that.
He was pretty wasted I guess, but the crippled guy threw the first punch it was awesome
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
I just got peed on. This karma circle is starting to get vicious.
Getting stoned and sitting front row in a legal class.. Not my best idea
Dude your life.. At your sugar daddies house sending nudes to your fwb
After sex he just told me I'm definitely pregnant and it's a girl. Should I run?
My name will be tattooed on his ass by sunday.
You texted me the words "butt stuff" 53 times in a four hour period last night.
I'm over being sad. I'm now onto thinking about all the ways in which he is a total fuckwaste
So I took my bra off and threw it in the bushes before we went to the bars..
Randomize
